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Julie_loc Posted 15 years ago
Grammar

Editing hep

can you help me edit these paragraphs?
Is it wrong to capture butterflies for display?
Butterflies are beautiful creatures. The sight of it flying freely is very beautiful, but it is wrong to capture it for display. Butterflies are living things. They don't deserve to be captured. They are a beautiful creation of nature. They deserve to live out its life in a natural way.
Butterflies are like humans. They are harmless. They deserve to be free and live. Butterflies are beautiful, just like all of us. They are made in every shape and size, in every color, and each one is unique. A butterfly is fragile, but with an inner strength like no other creature.
Butterflies are friendly and they do not harm you. They want to be happy and safe. They are delicate specimens. They can injure easily. Once you capture them, it can injure its wings which would make them unable to fly causing them to die.
  

Top answer

Hello, Julie - and welcome to English Forums. I have underlined some problem areas. Please fix them and post your revision here: Butterflies are beautiful creatures.

  • Hello, Julie - and welcome to English Forums.
  • I have underlined some problem areas.
  • Please fix them and post your revision here: Butterflies are beautiful creatures.
  • The sight of it flying freely is very beautiful, but it is wrong to capture it for display.
  • Butterflies are living things.
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1 Answers
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Hello, Julie - and welcome to English Forums.

I have underlined some problem areas. Please fix them and post your revision here:

Butterflies are beautiful creatures. The sight of it flying freely is very beautiful, but it is wrong to capture it for display. Butterflies are living things. They don't deserve to be captured. They are a beautiful creation

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