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Muayad Jajo Posted 20 years ago

Dollar Dolls

How would it feel when you think of all the dolls on display at toy stores and how they are just kept there away from children? How would you feel when you come to think of all the poor little children in the world whose parents cannot afford to buy them any toys and put a smile on their innocent faces? I wrote the poem below to express the way I feel about it. Your comments will be most appreciated.

DOLLAR DOLLS

Dolls meant for childhood

But touched by adulthood.

Dolls displayed for kids to behold

And none to hold but the toy store keeper’s hand.

Dolls reduced to dollars.

Dolls in despair. Dolls in distress,

Dungeoned in a glass fortress.

Whoever affords the tag attached, whoever purchases,

Saves the doll, saves the day

And ends it all happily
  

Top answer

A good idea, Muayad. I think it could be pared down; for instance: Whoever purchases is redundant and should be deleted. Hand is not none , and I would say simply the toy store keeper .

— Mister Micawber

  • A good idea, Muayad.
  • I think it could be pared down; for instance: Whoever purchases is redundant and should be deleted.
  • Hand is not none , and I would say simply the toy store keeper .
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3 Answers
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A good idea, Muayad.

I think it could be pared down; for instance:

Whoever purchases is redundant and should be deleted.
Hand is not none, and I would say simply the toy store keeper.
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Also, maybe "whoever can afford".

MrP
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Somehow this poem reminds me to those million dollars action figures which kids obviously can't afford.

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