Does this make sense?

Question

Is this a sentence that makes sense? Is it unusual?

I have been waiting for ten minutes, and I am yet to be assisted by a member of your staff. Normally, I would refrain from being so egregious, but given the circumstances, and our timely need to make a withdrawal, I am somewhat irked by the sheer incompetence my daughter and I find ourselves to be victim of at this so-called bank of yours.

Mister Micawber · Accepted Answer

anonymousIs this a sentence that makes sense?

No. You don't understand the vocabulary well enough to attempt to use such big words. Whether or not you mean to be, it is also very rude and quite uncalled for in protest of a simple 10-minute wait.

Anonymous · Answer

Does this part of my story make sense? Can you help me find a more suitable word than egregious? Thank you all.

At the Bank:

Mother: You there, are you the manager?

Manager: Yes, madam – kind of. How may I assist you?

Mother: Kind of? I’ve never heard such hilarity, are you the manager, or aren’t you?

Manager: Yes, madam.

Mother: I have been waiting for ten minutes, sitting on this rather uncomfortable chair I may add, and I am yet to be assisted by a member of your staff. Normally, I would refrain from being so egregious, but given the circumstances, and our timely need to make a withdrawal, I am somewhat irked by the sheer incompetence my daughter and I find ourselves to be victim of at this so-called bank of yours.

Manager: I do beg your pardon, madam?

Emily: Manager, if I may call you that, my mother and I have been waiting longer than we were told we would have to wait by your very polite receptionist over there. I wonder if you might be able to hasten the pace a little, that we may speak to a Mr Coin regarding a rather large withdrawal we are to make today.

Manager: Certainly, ladies. I do apologise for your having to wait longer than you were told. Is there anything I can get you in the meantime, perhaps a cup of tea? In fact, we may have some rather delectable biscuits that may to just to your liking. Oh, and for the record, my name is Porter, a Mr Edward Porter. I shall have one of our tea boys to fetch you those biscuits, and do you take one or two sugars in your tea, may I ask?

Does this make sense?

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