Does this make any sense?

Question

I'm writing an essay in science class and I'm not sure if this makes any sense. If anybody knows anything they can share to make it better I would really appreciate if you would share with me.
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"I've gone over these ten times! This just doesn't make sense anymore!" I shouted, throwing the file on the messy work area. Hi, my name is Lacie. Yes, the so-called insane woman who is trying (unsuccessfully) to figure out why the sun's light is decreasing.
"Oh, jeez. Lacie is going to blow a gasket," My annoying researcher, Jessica, mumbled incoherently and went back surfing the web for any hints or clues. Of course, she found nothing helpful or of use to my knowledge on the sun.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

This sounds like the beginning of a sci-fi story, but you have not finished it yet. Here are a few comments on the grammar.

Regards,
A-

s

"I've gone over these ten times! This just doesn't make sense anymore!" I shouted, throwing the file on the messy work area. Hi, my name is Lacie. Yes, the so-called insane woman who is trying (unsuccessfully) to figure out why the sun's light is decreasing. (sentence fragment - there is no main verb)
"Oh, jeez. Lacie is going to blow a gasket," My annoying (is Jessica annoying Lacie, or is Jessica annoyed?) researcher, Jessica, mumbled incoherently and went back surfing the web for any hints or clues. Of course, she found nothing helpful or of use (in understanding the data?) to my knowledge on the sun.

Mister Micawber · Answer

Hello, BeautifulRemains-- and welcome to Englishfoums.

This makes no sense at all as a Science essay. What was your assignment?

Does this make any sense?

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