Does it sound natural to a native speaker?

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Hi all,I would be pleased if someone could tell me if these sentences sound fine to a native speaker:1) From time to time, the palace is a venue for performances by costumed actors. (OR: COSTUMED ACTORS PERFORMANCES??)2) Visitors can explore the infamous bottle dungeon into which the body of Cardinal Beaton was thrown after his murder. This act was commited by protestants as a revenge for the burning of the reformist leader George Wishart. 3) Don´t miss the Great Kitchens which were restored to evoke the atmosphere of preparing a royal feast.4) This museum introduces the life of prisoners during several centuries by excursions with costumed guides.5) The title of the paragraph: City Nicknames (OR: CITY´S NICKNAMES??) -  is sometimes nicknamed „The World's  “ and „ of the North”. 6) The area comprises buildings from 12th to 20th century which proves that the castle was used for different purposes in the past.7) The vaults are an interesting part of the castle as it is a subterranean system of chambers used as a prison in the 18th and 19th centuries. 8) In the opposing building, you can think back to when you were children in the  which is the first of its kind in the world. 9) It happened on a place of today´s .10) I recommend you visiting the Royal Yacht Britannia.11) The Mid Tower is the best preserved one, also containing a well. (I WANT TO SAY THAT A WELL IS IN THE CENTRE OF THE MID TOWER)Thank you.

Yizhivika · Accepted Answer

Hi Eff,

Some do, some don't..

1) From time to time, the palace is a venue for performances by costumed actors. (OR: COSTUMED ACTORS PERFORMANCES??)

That's fine as it is. If you were to use 'costumed actors performances', you should add an apostrophe to 'actors' to make it a plural possessive, thus: 'costumed actors' performances'. However, the sentence sounds better the way you have written it; I'd find 'costumed actors' performances' a bit cumbersome here.

2) Visitors can explore the infamous bottle dungeon into which the body of Cardinal Beaton was thrown after his murder. This act was commited by protestants as a revenge for the burning of the reformist leader George Wishart.

I'd write the second sentence slightly differently:

This act was committed by protestants as a revenge [or in revenge] for the burning of the reformist leader George Wishart.

I'm not saying that as a revenge is necessarily wrong, but I'd use either 'as revenge' or 'in revenge'. Incidentally, the definite article in 'the reformist leader George Wishart' is optional; I'd probably omit it, although other native speakers wouldn't.

3) Don´t miss the Great Kitchens, which were restored to evoke the atmosphere of preparing a royal feast.

That's fine, except that I'd insert a comma after 'Kitchens', as shown.

4) This museum introduces the life of prisoners during several centuries by excursions with costumed guides.

I'd probably re-write this, as follows:

4) This museum introduces the life [or lives] of prisoners during [or throughout or over] several centuries, by means of [or way of] excursions with costumed guides.

5) The title of the paragraph: City Nicknames (OR: CITY´S NICKNAMES??) - Edinburgh is sometimes nicknamed „The World's Festival City“ and „Athens of the North”.

I think City Nicknames is fine here, but if you want to use City's Nicknames, I suggest that you use it with the definite article, The City's Nicknames.

6) The area comprises buildings from the 12^th to the 20^th century [or centuries], which proves that the castle was used for different purposes in the past.

Include the definite articles here.

7) The vaults are an interesting part of the castle, as ~~it is~~ they are a subterranean system of chambers used as a prison in the 18^th and 19^th centuries.

I probably over-use commas sometimes, but I think one is helpful here. You have a slight problem with 'The vaults'; as written, the two parts of the sentence need to agree. If 'The Vaults' were to be treated as a singular noun, you would have to say "The Vaults is an interesting...", then you could retain 'it is a subterranean system of chambers'. However, I don't know whether the said vaults are regarded as a single entity in the context of this particular castle.

8) In the opposing building [or the building opposite], you can think back to (a time) when you were children in the Museum of Childhood, which is the first of its kind in the world

9) It happened on ~~a place~~ the site of today´s Holyrood Palace.

10) I recommend your visiting the Royal Yacht Britannia.

Alternatively, you could say: I recommend that you visit the Royal Yacht Britannia.

11) The Mid Tower is the best preserved one, also containing a well. (I WANT TO SAY THAT A WELL IS IN THE CENTRE OF THE MID TOWER)

I'd write this as: The Mid Tower, which contains a well, is the best preserved one.

Apologies for the variable font sizes here; something went wrong with the 'cut and paste'

Does it sound natural to a native speaker?

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