Developments in agricultural technology

Question

Hello teachers,Is my paragraph proper English?The professor states that the developments in agricultural technology paved the way for the industrial Revalution in America. First, the invention of cotton gin made it possible to separate seeds faster from fibers. Therefore, the production of cotton was gone up to two million bales per year. So, there was enough raw materials for factories to get started. Second, the invention of combain or wheat thresher also made it possible to separate wheat seeds from husks and stems in a short period of time which eliminated the need for hiring more workers. So, farmers could produce more crops to feed workers who were leaving the farmlands to work in factories. Therefore, without the increase in the production of agricutural products and free workforce , the industrial Revalution wouldn't have taken place in America. Thank you for your time and effort.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

Hi, I have highlighted some places that need to be corrected.

The professor states that the developments in agricultural technology paved the way for the industrial Revalution in America. First, the invention of cotton gin made it possible to separate seeds faster from fibers. Therefore, the production of cotton was gone up to two million bales per year. So, there was enough raw materials for factories to get started. Second, the invention of combain or wheat thresher also made it possible to separate wheat seeds from husks and stems in a short period of time which eliminated the need for hiring more workers. So, farmers could produce more crops to feed workers who were leaving the farmlands to work in factories. Therefore, without the increase in the production of agricutural products and the free workforce, the industrial Revalution wouldn't have taken place in America.

Quaerereverum · Answer

Hello dear teacher,

I've tried to rectify highlighted places, however, I'm not sure I could do it properly.

The professor states that the developments in agricultural /English/AddPost.aspx?ReplyToPostId=1402559&Quote=False,/English/AddPost.aspx?ReplyToPostId=1402559&Quote=False paved the way for the industrial Revolution in America. First, the invention of cotton gin made it possible to separate seeds faster from fibers. Therefore, the production of cotton had been gone up to two million bales per year. So, there had been enough raw materials for factories to /English/AddPost.aspx?ReplyToPostId=1402559&Quote=False,/English/AddPost.aspx?ReplyToPostId=1402559&Quote=False. Second, the invention of combine or wheat thresher also made it possible to separate wheat seeds from husks and stems in a short period of time which eliminated the need for hiring more workers. So, farmers could produce more crops to feed workers who were leaving the farmlands to work in factories. Therefore, without the increase in the production of agricutural products and the /English/AddPost.aspx?ReplyToPostId=1402559&Quote=False,/English/AddPost.aspx?ReplyToPostId=1402559&Quote=False workforce, the industrial Revolution wouldn't have taken place in America.

Thank you so much AlpheccaStars for helping me.

AlpheccaStars · Answer

Here are some more changes:

The professor states that the developments in agricultural technology paved the way for the Industrial Revolution (if you capitalize one word, you have to capitalize the other words in the phrase) in America. First, the invention of the cotton gin made it possible to separate seeds faster from fibers faster. Therefore, the production of cotton ~~had been gone~~ went up to two million bales per year. So, there were enough raw materials for factories to get started. Second, the invention of the combine or wheat thresher also made it possible to separate wheat seeds from husks and stems in a short period of time, which eliminated the need for hiring more workers. So, farmers could produce more crops to feed workers who were leaving the farmlands to work in factories. Therefore, without the increase in the production of agricultural products and the free workforce, the industrial Revolution wouldn't have taken place in America.

Quaerereverum · Answer

Thank you AlpheccaStars. It is really kind of you. <img class='emoticon' style='Width:19px;Height:19px;' data-delaysrc='https://uat-englishforward-forums-backend.s3.us-west-2.amazonaws.com/Emoticons/1.gif' src='https://uat-englishforward-forums-backend.s3.us-west-2.amazonaws.com/Emoticons/1.gif' alt='Emotion: smile'/>

Developments in agricultural technology

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