Despite him being/despite his being

Question

Hi all,Thank you so much for taking time to read my question.I know it is common to say, "I like Matthew, despite him being my closest rival." But isn't it more correct to say, "I like Matthew, despite his being my closest rival."?Then what about common sentences like this: I saw him running away.Surely it cannot be re-written as "I saw his running away."?I'm really confused and would appreciate all help. Thanks!

Terryxpress · Accepted Answer

Good for you!

Yes - the gerund (verbal noun) takes the possessive pronoun.
Let's look at your sentences:
"I saw him running away."
This actually means, " I saw him/watched him as he ran away."
You could write the sentence:
"I saw him. He was running away."
but
"I like Matthew, despite him being my closest rival."
(as two separate sentences:)
I like Matthew, despite him. He is my closet rival."
The sentences now mean: Despite how much Michael seems to act in a way that causes people not to like him, I do like him. And he also happens to be my closest rival.

No. You like him despite being rivals.
Try this:
I like Michael, despite us being rivals.
Would it makes sense to write:
I like Michael, despite us. We are rivals.
Rather:
I like Michael, despite our being rivals.
'being', as a verbal noun, requires the possessive pronoun.

SJ88 · Answer

Hi Terryexpress,

Thanks for answering my question!

To sum it up, is it right to say the following two sentences are correct?

1. I saw him running away.
2. I like Michael, despite our being rivals.

"I like Michael, despite us being rivals" is therefore perhaps acceptable for colloquial use, but strictly speaking still incorrect? The reason I ask this is because such sentences are becoming all too common in books, even those by reputable publishers.

Once again, thanks a bunch!

Dimsumexpress · Answer

Hi,
This is my unsolicited two cents.
Despite- In spite of - Even though are all interchangeable, relatively speaking.

1. I saw him [running away]. - It is not a sentence with possessive property. But it sound fine.

2. I like Michael, despite our being rivals. - I supposed it is grammatical, but it sounds a bit awkwad to me. Personally, I would prefer "despite the fact that he is my rival", or ...Even though we are rivals ". However, if we must construct a sentence using " despite ", " him " is a object pronoun which sounds incorrect to my ears. There are several patterns to express the same idea. I am pretty certain that with the " despite " pattern, " his" is required in the possessive case. i.e.

Despite his position as my rival, I still like Michael.

I like Michael, despite his position being my rivals.
Despite being my rivals, I like Michael.
I like Michael, even though / [despite the fact that] he is my rival.

I hope I didn't confuse you!

SJ88 · Answer

Hi dimsumexpress,

I appreciate your help too =)

I understand it sounds awkward; I gave the example simply to clear up a point, rather than to seek the best phrasing of that particular sentence. As I mentioned in my reply, all too many publications nowadays have taken to publishing phrases like "despite us being rivals", which I thought to be ungrammatical. I just wanted to confirm that such a phrase is indeed ungrammatical. Of course, like you said, there are much better ways to phrase it. =)

Terryxpress · Answer

SJ88 : The way you have phrased your sentences is fine, and preferable to the suggested alternatives.

Yes - I can't believe that supposed wordsmiths(=skilled user of words, a professional writer) can have such a poor grasp of grammar at times; or are they merely reflecting the speech of so many these days?

If this keeps us, characters in TV shows will be saying, "I had went" ...and one I heard on Judge Judy from a middle class manager: "I had boughten him it for Christmas."

Anybody who despises you for your good grammar is uneducated. Those who note favourable your meticulous grammar are those who matter, career-wise.

SJ88 · Answer

Thank you very much for your encouraging words, Terryexpress! =)

Despite him being/despite his being

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