Could you please review my ielts writing task 2 essay

Some people believe that school children should not be given homework by their teachers, whereas other argue that homework plays an important role in the education of children. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

People argue that whether homework is necessary for the development of children or not. While some believe children should have more time to play instead of doing homework, the other think that homework still has an essential role in the education of children. In my view, I think that homework has an integral part and is vital for the education of children.

On one hand, it is understandable for some people to think that children should not be given homework. First, children have already spent almost a day studying at school, from morning to evening. So they need leisure time to relax and enjoy themselves. Second, children are very energetic and it is nearly impossible to keep them focus on doing homework without the interference of parents, they usually get distracted by the surroundings. Finally, the outdoor activities, such as playing football, basketball or hanging out with friends, could improve both the physical and mental health. And through these activities, children could learn soft skills as communication and teamwork which is extremely important for their development.

However, I do support the idea that homework is necessary and have a valuable role in the education of children. Homework is one of the most effective methods that encourage the independent study habit of children. Furthermore, doing homework gives children the revision of the lectures they had been taught at school and it helps them have a good grasp of the lessons. Besides, doing homework is crucial for the development of kids because it strengthens the focus ability and discipline of children. In my opinion, these characteristics are vital because it help children become a successful person in the future.

In conclusion, whereas other people think that homework is not necessary for the education of children, I still believe that it has an important and irreplaceable role for the growth of children. And all the benefits of it outweigh the drawbacks.