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Anh Dũng Hoàng Posted 5 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Could you please help me to correct this? This is my Ielts writing task 2. Thank you very much

Some teachers think that international student exchange would be beneficial for all teenage school students.

Do you think its advantages will outweigh the disadvantages?

In modern society, it is common for students to study abroad, Therefore, some teachers believe that a student exchange program between nations would have some benefits for themself. While this program still has some drawbacks, I concede that the opportunities of studying abroad might help students more confidently and should be encouraged.
To start off, the concern about the disadvantages of the international student exchange comes mostly from the risk of living in another country. To start a new life in an unfamiliar country, students could face some difficulties, such as language barriers, shock culture, or expensive living costs. They may find more time to adapt to the changes in their normal lives instead of immersing themselves in the opportunities of the exchange program. Therefore, many people argue that it is wasteful in both time and resources for students to take part in the international exchange, especially short-term programs,
On the other hand, many teachers claim that it is a good chance for students to gain more benefits through the exchange programs. Firstly, the students would have opportunities to discover the advanced aspects in other countries. For example, students from Vietnam could learn the modern technologies in Agriculture when studying in Ireland, the novel methods they used in Agriculture. In the meanwhile, Ireland students could have a chance to visit the field in Vietnam, how farmers successfully deal with the mangrove conditions in their field. As a result, students would partly widen their knowledge through this program. Secondly, it is a great chance for students to make new friends as well as to integrate into local cultures. Studying abroad which is means that students should live with other strange humans with dissimilar cultures. Students would have a probability to connect and integrate with others, to discover the local cultures and more importantly, they will be prepared to live by themselves. Therefore, international exchange programs would be more beneficial for student schools.
In conclusion, while there are some drawbacks when participating in the exchange programs, the benefits for students would surpass the limitations.

  

Top answer

) to study abroad . Therefore, some high school teachers believe that a student exchange program between nations would have some benefits for themself . (ungrammatical.

  • ) to study abroad .
  • Therefore, some high school teachers believe that a student exchange program between nations would have some benefits for themself .
  • (ungrammatical.
  • The question is not about how it benefits the teachers.
  • Who gets the benefits?
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In modern society, (unnatural) It is common now for students (Do you mean university students?) to study abroad. Therefore, some high school teachers believe that a student exchange program between

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