Could you please check my writing Ielts task 2? Thank you very much.

Animal species are becoming extinct due to human activity on land and in sea. Why has this happened? What's the solution?

Many terrestrial and marine animal species are now endangered as a result of the actions of humans. Various forms of environmental destruction have brought about this situation, and solutions must be found and implemented urgently.

The decline in many animal species stems from overhunting and environmental degradation. Hunting rare animals is one of the most noteworthy reasons why many animals are on the brink of extinction. Rhino species, for instance, are on the verge of extinction due to human misunderstanding of its horn as a valuable herb that can bring them high profits. Another problem is environmental pollution caused by deforestation and industrial waste. A few companies in industrial zones discharge untreated water into the river, causing mass fish deaths, seriously affecting a large area.

In order to save species from extinction, the conservation role of zoos must be prioritized. In addition to being well-cared and protected from skilled hunters, many zoos now have successful captive breeding programmes, of which the giant panda is perhaps the most famous. Endangered animals ought to be protected also in their natural habitats through the elimination of poaching and the creation of more wildlife reserves. Besides, the governments need to raise people’s awareness about the protection of the marine environment and strictly handle violations such as discharging chemical waste into the sea.

In conclusion, it is clear that problems caused by humans are extremely serious and we cannot solve them overnight. Yet if the government and individuals share collective responsibilities, some solutions are likely to be offered.