Could you help me with my writing Ielts task 1, please? Thank you a lot.

Question

The line graph compares the three regions in terms of wheat exports between 1985 and 1990.

Overall, there was a similar downward trend in the number of wheat exports of Australia and Canada, whereas European Community experienced a contrasting movement over the given period.

As the graph shows, Australia’s wheat exports started at 15 million tonnes in 1985, which was the lowest at the beginning. This was followed by a slight increase to about 16 million tonnes in 1986 and then it went down steadily to around 12 million tonnes at the end of the given period. Between 1985 and 1986, the number of European Community’s wheat exports decreased significantly by 3 million tonnes approximately, but then it boomed to about 21 million tonnes in 1990.

In 1985, nearly 20 million tonnes of wheat were exported by Canada, this number was the highest at the start point. Then, the exports reached a peak at 25 million tonnes in 1988 and declined sharply to under 15 million tonnes in 1989. But at the end of the given period, this figure went up to 17 million tonnes approximately.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

Please read my advice for Task 1 essays:

IELTS TASK 1: Hints, Tips And Advice

Vocabulary Words For Task 1: Reference Post

AlpheccaStars · Answer

The line graph compares the three regions in terms of their wheat exports between 1985 and 1990. (What are the three regions?)

Overall, there was a similar downward trend in the number (wrong word. "Exports" is non-count. "Number" does not work with non-count items.) amounts / quantities of wheat exports of Australia and Canada, whereas the European Community ~~experienced~~ (wrong word) a contrasting movement (That makes no sense) over the ~~given~~ period.

~~As the graph shows,~~ (Useless. There is only one graph. ) Australia’s wheat exports started at 15 million tonnes in 1985, which was the lowest at the beginning. (Incorrect. It was lower in 1990, so 1985 was not the lowest value.) This was followed by a slight increase to about 16 million tonnes in 1986 and then it went down steadily to around 12 million tonnes in 1990. ~~at the end of the given period~~. (Verbose.) Between 1985 and 1986, the number (wrong word) of the European Community’s wheat exports decreased ~~significantly~~ by approximately 3 million tonnes ~~approximately~~, but then it boomed (That is not good or even appropriate. Read my advice.) to about 21 million tonnes in 1990.

In 1985, nearly 20 million tonnes of wheat were exported by Canada, this ~~number~~ was the highest at the start point. (That is incorrect. It was higher in 1988.) Then, the exports reached a peak at 25 million tonnes in 1988 and declined sharply to under 15 million tonnes (10 million is under 15 million and so is 7 million. You need an adverb.) in 1989. But ~~at the end of the given period~~, ~~this figure~~ (wrong word. Read my advice) it went up to approximately 17 million tonnes ~~approximately~~.

There are several ways to improve your essay. You need to focus on comparisons, combinations, and the "big picture." Essays in which the values from each individual curve are copied into paragraphs do not get the highest marks. It is not following the instructions. It is not university-level wiring.

You tend to be verbose. There are some tricks to avoid this wordiness. This is a math/science context, not a newspaper article or blog account, so I advise students to avoid sensational or emotional words or anthropomorphic verbs.

Read my advice on this topic. If you would like a sample essay, you may ask for one.

AlpheccaStars · Answer

The line graph compares the wheat exports (in millions of tonnes (MT)) of three world regions, the European Community (EU), Canada and Australia between 1985 and 1990.

Overall the total amount did not vary significantly over this period, but the proportions contributed by the individual regions did. Canada was the leading exporter from 1985 through mid-1988, and was surpassed by the EU at that point. It had the largest swings over the period compared to the other two regions.

In detail, the total amount was 51 MT in 1985, and about the same in 1990. Canada had the largest share, especially at its peak of 25 MT in 1988, when it represented almost half of the total. Australia had a slow decline over the period; from its highest level of 16 MT in 1986, it slid to 11 MT in 1990. The EU exports remained in a narrow range between 15 and 17 MT from 1985 through 1988, when it rose to 19 and then 21 MT in 1989 and 1990, surpassing Canada whose exports were, correspondingly, 14 and 19 MT.

Could you help me with my writing Ielts task 1, please? Thank you a lot.

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