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SunnyShiny Posted 16 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
Could you correct my essay
It has been clearly seen that, the position of women in society has been enhancing higher and the role of women is getting more important that before. In my opinion, according to women's' essential position at home they should make a balance between their work and home's duty to educate their children better.
At first, women can built financial part of a family. Beside financial independent for women with working, they can help their husband and family to have a better life. It is a chance for women to show their abilities and exhibit their talents in different majors.
In addition, although working outside cause mothers have less time to be with their children, it get them more independency than before. Women can get many experiences by contacting with other people, facing to different situation,... in this way. They can increase their individual autonomous and also their information. So they can be more helpful for their family.
Furthermore, although women should devote some free times to their children, sharing time is not as important as true education. Parents should try to raise their children true and independence that children could solve their problems and decide correctly. However, parents protect them but it doesn't need to pass much time with them.
In conclusion, with true education women do not need to be always with their children. Also the position of women in society can help to have successful children.
At first, women can built financial part of a family. Beside financial independent for women with working, they can help their husband and family to have a better life. It is a chance for women to show their abilities and exhibit their talents in different majors.
In addition, although working outside cause mothers have less time to be with their children, it get them more independency than before. Women can get many experiences by contacting with other people, facing to different situation,... in this way. They can increase their individual autonomous and also their information. So they can be more helpful for their family.
Furthermore, although women should devote some free times to their children, sharing time is not as important as true education. Parents should try to raise their children true and independence that children could solve their problems and decide correctly. However, parents protect them but it doesn't need to pass much time with them.
In conclusion, with true education women do not need to be always with their children. Also the position of women in society can help to have successful children.
Top answer
(I tried to retain the meaning. I hope it worked) It is clear the position of women in society has been enhanced in recent years and the role of women is getting more important than before. In my opinion, due to a woman's essential position at home, women should strike a balance between work and family duty in order to better educate their children.
- (I tried to retain the meaning.
- I hope it worked) It is clear the position of women in society has been enhanced in recent years and the role of women is getting more important than before.
- In my opinion, due to a woman's essential position at home, women should strike a balance between work and family duty in order to better educate their children.
- In the early years of marriage, , women can help build the financial part of a family.
- As a result of the financial independence gained from working, women can help their husbands and families to have a better life.
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1 Answers
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(I tried to retain the meaning. I hope it worked)
It is clear the position of women in society has been enhanced in recent years and the role of women is getting more important than before. In my opinion, due to a woman's essential position at home, women should strike a balance between work and family duty in order to better educate their children.
In the early years of marri
It is clear the position of women in society has been enhanced in recent years and the role of women is getting more important than before. In my opinion, due to a woman's essential position at home, women should strike a balance between work and family duty in order to better educate their children.
In the early years of marri
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