Could anyone find out mistakes in my paragraph, please?

Question

I would like to say that I access to Internet via a Local Area Network which is monitored by a proxy server. In other words, I live in a campus where there is a local Area Network which has a proxy server with address and authentication. I have the address of that proxy sever along with its authentications(username and password). Thus, I  you fairly sure that a proxy server blocks the downloading of the torrent files and my evidence is that when I have tried downloading any torrent files from a site which is a local address, I could download the torrent files, especially when I firstly have checked the option ' Bypass proxy server for local addresses/sites" and then clicked the 'advance settings' button for a proxy server inside the settings of LAN in my internet options. After that, I have entered the local sites in the box which is below the option 'Exception: Do not use proxy server for local sites addresses' inside the setting of proxy server . But this didn't solve my problem I need a solution to my problem. How I can let proxy server allow to the torrent files to be downloaded from global sites. Maybe you will be saying to me that I will have to contact the administrator of my network. I would like to say that this will be taking a long time until he responses. I think these sites aren't prohibited or fraudulent. Thus, Are there not other solutions?

Mohammad Lardhi · Accepted Answer

Mohammad LardhiI would like to say that I access to Internet via a Local Area Network which is monitored by a proxy server. In other words, I live in a campus where there is a local Area Network which has a proxy server with address and authentication. I have the address of that proxy sever along with its authentications(username and password). Thus, I you fairly sure that a proxy server blocks the downloading of the torrent files and my evidence is that when I have tried downloading any torrent files from a site which is a local address, I could download the torrent files, especially when I firstly have checked the option ' Bypass proxy server for local addresses/sites" and then clicked the 'advance settings' button for a proxy server inside the settings of LAN in my internet options. After that, I have entered the local sites in the box which is below the option 'Exception: Do not use proxy server for local sites addresses' inside the setting of proxy server . But this didn't solve my problem I need a solution to my problem. How I can let proxy server allow to the torrent files to be downloaded from global sites. Maybe you will be saying to me that I will have to contact the administrator of my network. I would like to say that this will be taking a long time until he responses. I think these sites aren't prohibited or fraudulent. Thus, Are there not other solutions?

I would like to say that I access to Internet via a Local Area Network which is monitored by a proxy server. In other words, I live in a campus where there is a local Area Network which has a proxy server with address and authentication. I have the address of that proxy sever along with its authentications(username and password). Thus, I you fairly sure that a proxy server blocks the downloading of the torrent files and my evidence is that when I have tried downloading any torrent files from a site which is a local address, I could download the torrent files, especially when I firstly have checked the option ' Bypass proxy server for local addresses/sites" and then clicked the 'advance settings' button for a proxy server inside the settings of LAN in my internet options. After that, I have entered the local sites in the box which is below the option 'Exception: Do not use proxy server for local sites addresses' inside the setting of proxy server . But this didn't solve my problem I need a solution to my problem. How I can let proxy server allow to the torrent files to be downloaded from global sites. Maybe you will be saying to me that I will have to contact the administrator of my network. I would like to say that this will be taking a long time until he responds. I think these sites aren't prohibited or fraudulent. Thus, Are there not other steps to be applied in the settings of the proxy server in order to let copyrighted global sites excluded from the monitor of the proxy server as I have done with local sites?

Dimsumexpress · Answer

I would like to say that I access to Internet via a Local Area Network which is monitored by a proxy server. In other words, I live in a campus where there is a local Area Network which has a proxy server with address and authentication. I have the address of that proxy sever along with its authentications(username and password). Thus, I you fairly sure that a proxy server blocks the downloading of the torrent files and my evidence is that when I have tried downloading any torrent files from a site which is a local address, I could download the torrent files, especially when I firstly have checked the option ' Bypass proxy server for local addresses/sites" and then clicked the 'advance settings' button for a proxy server inside the settings of LAN in my internet options. After that, I have entered the local sites in the box which is below the option 'Exception: Do not use proxy server for local sites addresses' inside the setting of proxy server . But this didn't solve my problem I need a solution to my problem. How I can let proxy server allow to the torrent files to be downloaded from global sites. Maybe you will be saying to me that I will have to contact the administrator of my network. I would like to say that this will be taking a long time until he responds. I think these sites aren't prohibited or fraudulent. Thus, Are there not other steps to be applied in the settings of the proxy server in order to let copyrighted global sites excluded from the monitor of the proxy server as I have done with local sites?Mohammad LardhiThis is how I interpreted your post. I am not sure if your posted material is a complaint letter or a correspondence requesting for help. It is perplexing and the tone is unpleasing. At the latter part you sounded like as if you wanted assistance, but you didn't come right out directly asking for it. If this is indeed the case, I would expect some form of courtesy language resembling "please" and "thank you" but I didn't find them, also, " I would like to say " is a rather strange way to begin asking for assistance. Your first two lines are basically a repeat of the first one. There are many issues: on campus, not "in". Your narration of what you had tried began with present tense and shifted to past tense, which made the sequence of events rather obscure, especially when one is not an IT expert. Also, try not to use multiple relative clauses in a the same run. Keep it simple and direct. i.e. I have this problem and I need your help. Be courteous and humble. The last part was going the opposite.

Mohammad Lardhi · Answer

Thank you so much indeed

You are quite right my message didn't sound a courtesy language . I am quite upset from the administrator of my network because he let the proxy server blocks so many copyrighted global sites which I think they shouldn't have been monitored.

When I repeat these lines:
I access to Internet via a Local Area Network which is monitored by a proxy server. In other words, I live in a campus where there is a local Area Network which has a proxy server with address and authentication. I have the address of that proxy sever along with its authentications(username and password).

I wanted to clarify the kind of my internet connection. I think that I have said "in other words"

dimsumexpressI live in a campus where there is a local Area Network which has a proxy server with address and authentication.

I have used a restrictive relative clause to restrict what campus and network are .

dimsumexpress How I can let proxy server allow to the torrent files to be downloaded from global sites. Maybe you will be saying to me that I will have to contact the administrator of my network. I would like to say that this will be taking a long time until he responds. I think these sites aren't prohibited or fraudulent. Thus, Are there not other steps to be applied in the settings of the proxy server in order to let copyrighted global sites excluded from the monitor of the proxy server as I have done with local sites?

Yes, this part is quite opposite for what has been said. Because I am expecting that the person I am asking him the help will say to me contact your administrator

Could anyone find out mistakes in my paragraph, please?

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