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hello, i'm trying to translate a sentence, does the following phrase sound good in English? :
"as a result she studied acting under real professsionals in theatrical sphere, and what is more, for 4 yaers has she been playing and learning at an educational theatre, where they made musicals in English."

Blue Roses · Accepted Answer

It's too long and confusing. Divide it into smaller sentences.

Maybe...

As a result, she studied under real professionals in the theatrical sphere. What's more, she's been playing and learning at an educational theater, where they made musicals in English, for 4 years.

Is that an acceptable alternative?

Dimsumexpress · Answer

Blue RosesAs a result, she studied [what ?] under real professionals in the theatrical sphere. What's more, she's been playing and learning at an educational theater, where they made musicals in English, for 4 years.

This is my 2 cents, from simply reacting to the sound of it.

If this is a resume, I will ask the following questions:

* What subject did she study precisely?

* What do "real professional" and "theatrical sphere" exactly mean? You need
credentials to support your points.
* Additionally - works better than [what is more] in my opinion.
* I would rephrase it to: She's been studying and performing for 4 years at [the xyz ] educational
theater, where they produce English musicals.

Clive · Answer

Hi,

I don't know what 'an educational theatre' means. Can you say it another way?

Clive

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