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Pinky88 Posted 19 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
Correct my paragraph plzz :)
From not long ago, it was happening in the neighborhood a series of robberies of homes and cars too.
The people of the neighborhood feel scared and insecurity and disturbing specially for the passage of a long period, the police could not arrest them; we were hear from time to time a new stealing in neighborhood.
On April 8, my brother and I were in the house Which is still a 7-year old. At home alone and my mother and father they went to visit their friend Outside the city.
When it become 11 I was sleeping and my brother too , than I wake up
Because I felt thirst, While I was walking to the kitchen I heard voices in the living room So I run quickly to the phone and called the police . To tell them about a thief in my house. Than I went quickly to the bed room were my brother sleep than I locked the door and we waite the police .
after 10 Minutes they came and Confining the house from all directions Than the thief had been arrested, He was the same thief who stole houses in the neighborhood all this time...
In next mooring the people who live in neighborhood thanks me and Appreciate what I done and the police give me Medal for my courage.
The people of the neighborhood feel scared and insecurity and disturbing specially for the passage of a long period, the police could not arrest them; we were hear from time to time a new stealing in neighborhood.
On April 8, my brother and I were in the house Which is still a 7-year old. At home alone and my mother and father they went to visit their friend Outside the city.
When it become 11 I was sleeping and my brother too , than I wake up
Because I felt thirst, While I was walking to the kitchen I heard voices in the living room So I run quickly to the phone and called the police . To tell them about a thief in my house. Than I went quickly to the bed room were my brother sleep than I locked the door and we waite the police .
after 10 Minutes they came and Confining the house from all directions Than the thief had been arrested, He was the same thief who stole houses in the neighborhood all this time...
In next mooring the people who live in neighborhood thanks me and Appreciate what I done and the police give me Medal for my courage.
Top answer
Not long ago, a series of home and car robberies was happening in my neighborhood. My neighbors felt scared, insecurity and disturbing for a while. Robberies happened again and again because the police had not arrested any robbers.
- Not long ago, a series of home and car robberies was happening in my neighborhood.
- My neighbors felt scared, insecurity and disturbing for a while.
- Robberies happened again and again because the police had not arrested any robbers.
- On April 8, my seven-year old brother and I were in the house.
- We were home alone because my mother and father went to visit their friends in the suburb.
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2 Answers
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Not long ago, a series of home and car robberies was happening in my neighborhood. My neighbors felt scared, insecurity and disturbing for a while. Robberies happened again and again because the police had not arrested any robbers.
On April 8, my seven-year old brother and I were in the house. We were home alone because my mother and father went to visit their friends in the suburb.
On April 8, my seven-year old brother and I were in the house. We were home alone because my mother and father went to visit their friends in the suburb.
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2 cents:
1. insecurity should be insecure
2. car theft rather than car robberies
1. insecurity should be insecure
2. car theft rather than car robberies
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