Hi, I check random writing audits during the week and this one stood out. Could you please provide some technical insight into this?
Writer: "Call us to check our available schedules. We also speak fluent Japanese to accommodate our non-English speaking clients."
Auditor: We need to make sure that the write-up is clear. What if the non-English speaking client does not understand/is not Japanese?
Auditor Revision: This could be simplified to, "Call us to check our available schedules. We speak fluent Japanese."Writer's Dispute: We would like to point the contextual meaning of the sentence in relation to the previous one. The first sentence of this paragraph urges the potential customers to call to know the available schedule. It will then flow to the next sentence that says, "We also speak fluent Japanese to accommodate our non-English speaking clients". It only means that they can call (non-English speaking customers) if they understand Japanese, not necessarily generalizing that all non-speaking customers can speak Japanese but targeting only those who can (it will be a Plus factor for them). Also, using the suggested sentence: “We speak fluent Japanese” does not have any connection to the previous sentence, will stand as an individual one defeating the flow of thought.
Many thanks!
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