Check My Sentence Plz

I would write...

If I became a rose on my branch, If my broken branch will be on your hands, I would be ready to die.

But I am not an English native speaker so it might be just just a waste of time... Sorry.

I think you're trying to write poetry, not a sentence, but it doesn't make a lot of sense.

If you are a rose on YOUR branch? What does that mean.

Are you aiming for something like this?

If I were a rose
And I should fall
Into your hands,
My purpose would be complete
And I would be content to wither there

I never claimed to be a poet, but I'm no

No poetry, i want it to be checked just for grammar

I think that this is a perfect example of what I call "Future Tense in Subjunctive Mode", which is more or less rare in current speaking.

"If I become a rose on my branch.", is a CONDITIONAL (IF), and it prepares the second key expression which is: "If my broken branch WILL BE on your hands". which is also a CONDITIONAL expression (IF).

But if you combine IF with a verb in FU

So is it correct ?

Volcano1985If I become a rose on my branch, If my broken branch will be on your hands, I am ready to die

Is it correct? No.

(I still don't know what you mean by a rose on YOUR branch? If you're a rose, you're a rose, not an entire bush.)

You can't have those two "If" statements in a row with a comma. If... branch, a

If I am rose, I have my rose and branch or branches, right?

If I become a rose and If my broken branch will be in your hands, I am ready to die

If I change the tenses, it doesn't give the meaning of the original sentence...

I'll always walk along side of you never over you.

I'll always walk alongside you, never over you.