Cause and effect/ with him

Question

Which are correct:1-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete and Pete lose his temper. 2-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete with Pete losing his temper.3-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete, then him lose his temper. 4-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete, him losing his temper.Gratefully, Navi.

Teacher_kt · Accepted Answer

I once saw Harry commit something foul on Pete and Pete lost his temper.

Navitasan · Answer

I think all of my originals are better than that one.
It seems to me that "something foul" is definitely wrong.

Cheers,
Navi.

Rover_KE · Answer

navitasanWhich are correct:1-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete and Pete lose his temper. 2-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete with Pete losing his temper.3-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete, then him lose his temper. 4-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete, him losing his temper.Gratefully, Navi.

None of those sentences is natural.

'I once saw Harry foul Pete, who lost his temper.'

Rover

CalifJim · Answer

navitasanWhich are correct:
1-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete and Pete lose his temper.
2-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete with Pete losing his temper.
3-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete, then him lose his temper.
4-I once saw Harry commit a foul on Pete, him losing his temper.

1 is the best. 2 is borderline. 3 and 4 are wrong.

In practical terms you can only use this structure when the coordinated elements are very short.

When the monster popped out of the box, I heard [ [ Kate gasp ] and [ Liz shriek ] ].
I saw [ [ Harry slip ] and [ Pete stumble ] ] as they encountered the obstructions in the path.

And even then these are not the best stylistically. By the time you include the number of words in the example below, you've made a mess of things.

The audience enjoyed watching [ [ the clowns do acrobatic flips ] and [ the elephants parade around the ring ] ].

CJ

Cause and effect/ with him

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