Can you review my ielts writing task 2, please.

Topic: All education (primary, secondary, and further education) should be
free to all people and paid and managed by the government.
Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is argued that the authority should subsidize all tuition fees for students and manage the education system from primary to further education, while there are some critics. I firmly believe tuition-free education would bring several benefits to the community. In the essay below, some features will be shed some light to support my view.

On the one hand, thanks to the government's subsidy, all children including underprivileged children could avail themselves of the opportunity to access basic education. Thus, they could have a decent preparation for their adulthood and turn over a new leaf. Moreover, it is true that the more people afford education, the lower the illiteracy rate is, therefore, awareness would be raised among citizens. Indeed, lack of knowledge and skills is responsible for unemployment which is attributed to the increasing thievery rate. Hence, providing education without charge is deemed to be a key to curb the likelihood of crime committed which is to blame for poverty and ignorance. On the other hand, there are also various drawbacks that follow from the complimentary education. Firstly, if this policy was enforced, policy-makers would have to allocate the state budget. In other words, the government would have to impose higher taxes on citizens or else put less priority on other sectors such as healthcare, national defense, and so forth. Such sectors, by common consent, bring immediate benefit, meanwhile, it needs to be a long-run investment to reap the benefits from education. For instance, in my hometown in Vietnam, a myriad of patients fail to afford proper healthcare treatment and be in need of financial support. In conclusion, the advantages of funding education outweigh the disadvantages. Education is always a considerable matter in many a nation. Accordingly, it is comprehensively necessary to make education become accessible for everyone. Thank you so much.