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Anonymous Posted 20 years ago
Grammar

Can you make this sentence look more delicate and well structured

The sentence is:

"Additionally, it broadened my perspective of thought from merely stating the arguments to a much broader vision of critically evaluating arguments. I learned to judge the information presented in various reference materials such as books, rather than simply accepting the facts as they are."
  

Top answer

Moreover/Then again, it broadened my perspective of thought from merely stating arguments to a far broader vision of critically evaluating them. " Hope this helps, - YoHf [8]

  • Moreover/Then again, it broadened my perspective of thought from merely stating arguments to a far broader vision of critically evaluating them.
  • " Hope this helps, - YoHf [8]
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3 Answers
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Moreover/Then again, it broadened my perspective of thought from merely stating arguments to a far broader vision of critically evaluating them. I did learn to judge the information presented in various reference materials such as books (I'd add some more examples here), rather than simply accepting facts as (you may think of changing "as" here, since you have already used it in the former
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Hi Anon.,

Is this what you mean?

Additionally, it broadened my perspective. Instead of merely stating the arguments or accepting facts as stated in various reference materials, I learned to evaluate the information or arguments presented by authoritative sources.

(I don't like this either, for I use "state" twice. Stylistically this isn't v. good)
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Moreover, it helped to strenghten my critical ability by helping me to develop the frame of mind to critically evaluate arguments and critically analyze the information that is being presented from various reference sources, including books, rather than simply accepting the facts as they are being presented.

(This might not be what you wanted to say, but to me, this sounds better eventh

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