Can you leave some comments for my Ielts writing task 2?

Q: City dwellers seldom socialize with their neighbors today and the sense of community has been lost. Why has this happened and how to solve this problem?

A: These days, an increasing number of people have concerned about the phenomenon that urban citizens rarely communicate with people in surroundings. Therefore, relationship among neighbors could no longer disappear. Personally, I suppose that there are several reasons behind this trend and some solutions should be taken to obstacle this problem.

On the one hand, people in cities are now too busy with work, so they have little or even no time for other people, especially neighbors. From an economic perspective, they have to pay attention on work to make ends meet. A white-collar, for instance, often seeks an extra job to do in the weekends, which can easily lead to a poor relationship with neighborhood. Moreover, privacy can be be a remarkable problem with people in modern cities. Along with the development of technology, it would not be an arduous task for humans to socialize through the Internet. Surprisingly, they would rather make friends with strangers on social networks than invite their neighbors for a chat.

As these reasons mentioned above, some measures should be taken into consideration in order to resolve this issue. In terms of overloaded working time, there should be a restrict on their part-time jobs outside working hours. When it comes to technology, the period for mobile phones, tablets, computers and other forms of portable devices should be deeply curbed. By getting out of these digital gadgets as much as possible, there would be more time for neighbors to penetrate and get helps from each other. Not only individuals but also governments should set up a propaganda about benefits of neighborhood communication as long as organize more cultural activities to incentivize them.

In conclusion, there are various reasons related to this trend and appropriate steps need taking to tackle this problem by both citizens and policy makers. Then the better life's satisfaction would obviously come as a result.