Can you help me with my task 1 Ielts?

Question

The bar chart compares how many hours Chester adolescents spend on seven activities every week from 2002 to 2007.

It is clear that watching television was the most popular activity whereas bowling was the least favorite. Going to pubs, watching TV and shopping experienced an increase in the hours teenagers spent on these activities while the opposite trend was true for doing homework, doing sports and bowling. Watching DVDS is the unique that showed a fluctuation.

Teenagers spent 25 hours watching TV in 2002, which then increased to almost 40 hours in the next five years. Going to pubs and disco and shopping both took significantly tripled hours from over 5 to over 15 and from over 5 to exactly 15 in 2007.

While teenagers occupied 10 hours doing homework in 2002, this figure dropped to just over 5 hours in 2007. Similarly, the hours for doing sports fell dramatically from 10 to around 3 . Bowling was around 5 during the entire period declining by about 4 hours in total. The hours of watching DVDs was variable which was the same in the same and the final year but went up and down other years and peaked at 15 hours in 2004 and 2005.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

Please post essays, paragraphs, dialogues and other writing in the essay forum so a moderator does not have to move your post.
https://www.englishforums.com/English/EssayReportCompositionWriting/Forum9.htm

Please attach an image of what you are writing about. We cannot help you if we can't see the figure.

Please read my advice for Task 1 essays.

IELTS TASK 1: Hints, Tips And Advice

Vocabulary Words For Task 1: Reference Post

Koanh1124 · Answer

here is my exercise.

Koanh1124 · Answer

I'm sorry, something went wrong and I don't know that my pic hasn't appear there.

Koanh1124 · Answer

AlpheccaStars · Answer

You should learn to do interpolation - that is to judge the values that lie between two tick marks (or demarcation lines). Your essay is rather long.

The bar chart compares how many hours Chester adolescents spend on seven activities every week from 2002 to 2007. (That means the first week in January 2002, the second week in January 2002, the third week in January 2002, ... the third week in December 2006, the last week in December 2006. Is that what is on the chart?)

Example:

The time-series clustered bar chart depicts the average number of hours each week that teenagers in Chester spend doing seven different activities. Data is shown for each year from 2002 through 2007. The activities include passive and active recreation to chores such as homework and shopping.

~~It is clear that~~ Overall, watching television was the most ~~popular~~ frequent activity whereas bowling was the least ~~favorite~~. The hours spent going to pubs, watching TV and shopping ~~experienced~~ (wrong word. ) increased over this six-year period ~~in the hours teenagers spent on these activities~~ while the opposite ~~trend~~ was true for doing homework, doing sports and bowling. Watching DVDS is the unique (unique is an adjective) that showed a distinct peak ~~fluctuation~~. (wrong word. There is no fluctuation to be seen in this plot. Did you read my vocabulary advice? Watching DVDs is unique in that it is the only activity showing a distinct peak.)

Teenagers spent 25 hours watching TV in 2002, which then increased to almost 40 hours in over the next five years. Going to pubs ~~and disco~~ and going shopping both took significantly tripled hours (ungrammatical and incorrect. For shopping, in 2002, the bar is halfway between 5 and 10 hours. That is a value of 7.5 hours.) ~~from over 5 to over 15 and from over 5 to exactly 15 in 2007.~~ The time they spent shopping doubled slowly and steadily from about 7.5 to 15 hours. In contrast, the time going out to pubs rose slowly over the first three years from 8 to 12 hours and then jumped in the last year from 12 to 18 hours.)

While teenagers ~~occupie~~d (wrong word) devoted 13 10 hours to doing homework in 2002, ~~this figure~~ it dropped to ~~just over 5~~ 7 hours in by 2007. Similarly, the hours for doing sports fell ~~dramatically~~ from 10 to around 3 . Bowling was ~~around~~ less than 5 during the entire period, slowly declining by about 4 hours ~~in total~~. The hours of watching DVDs was variable which was the same in the same and the final year (That makes no sense) but went up and down other years and peaked at 15 (wrong value) hours in 2004 and 2005.

e.g.

Watching DVDs had an interesting pattern. Starting at 11 hours in 2002, it increased to a peak of about 18 hours in 2004, followed by a decrease to 10 hours in 2007.

Can you help me with my task 1 Ielts?

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