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Perfect Stranger Posted 13 years ago
Business & Finance
Can you help me unjumble this mumbo jumbo?
Hey there,
Can you help me unjumble this paragraph and put it into some kind of order? I think this is really, really badly written... It's bloody chaotic! I feel dizzy!
During the 12th five-year plan period, the Group established the overall development strategy ‘with the value chain of the construction industry as the main line, with infrastructure construction as the core business, be stronger in railway projects, be bigger in non-railway projects, expanding overseas businesses, bringing about product structure transition; changing from extensive growth to intensive growth, gradually pushing forward lean management, and promoting enterprise benefit’. With supports form various sectors of the society, by the end of the 12th five-year plan period, the Group will be established as a new type of general contractor enterprise with reasonable product mix, optimized organization structure, effective modes of management and control, a matching talent structure, a larger scale and a stronger profitability.
Can you help me unjumble this paragraph and put it into some kind of order? I think this is really, really badly written... It's bloody chaotic! I feel dizzy!
During the 12th five-year plan period, the Group established the overall development strategy ‘with the value chain of the construction industry as the main line, with infrastructure construction as the core business, be stronger in railway projects, be bigger in non-railway projects, expanding overseas businesses, bringing about product structure transition; changing from extensive growth to intensive growth, gradually pushing forward lean management, and promoting enterprise benefit’. With supports form various sectors of the society, by the end of the 12th five-year plan period, the Group will be established as a new type of general contractor enterprise with reasonable product mix, optimized organization structure, effective modes of management and control, a matching talent structure, a larger scale and a stronger profitability.
Top answer
Sorry, can't help - no idea what it's supposed to mean. But what a glorious example of management gobbledegook!
- Sorry, can't help - no idea what it's supposed to mean.
- But what a glorious example of management gobbledegook!
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4 Answers
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Sorry, can't help - no idea what it's supposed to mean.
But what a glorious example of management gobbledegook!
But what a glorious example of management gobbledegook!
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Thanks Penny,
Would you please be so kind and have a look at my attempt to rephrase and restructure the previous paraghrap? I'd like to know if my attempt is grammaticaly correct and sounds well-enough to your native ear.
During the 12th five-year plan period, the Group established an overall development strategy based on several significant assump
Would you please be so kind and have a look at my attempt to rephrase and restructure the previous paraghrap? I'd like to know if my attempt is grammaticaly correct and sounds well-enough to your native ear.
During the 12th five-year plan period, the Group established an overall development strategy based on several significant assump
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Hi again,
You've done a great job!
A couple of minor amendments I would make:
Penny
PS Love your name
You've done a great job!
A couple of minor amendments I would make:
- Firstly the main line of our business is THE construction industry
- Thirdly, we aim TO EXPAND overseas BUSINESS in markets
- the Group will HAVE establishED its position as a new type
Penny
PS Love your name
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Thanks Penny!
Ah, I always forget about the future perfect tense...
Appreciate your comments!
Your nick brings to mind James Bond movies. Penny + M = Moneypenny
Ah, I always forget about the future perfect tense...
Appreciate your comments!
Your nick brings to mind James Bond movies. Penny + M = Moneypenny
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