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Jackhyde Posted 5 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Can you help me check my IELTS writing task 1?


The pie charts compare the amount of energy generated using different sources, namely gas, petrol, coal, nuclear, and other sources in France in two years 1995 and 2005

It is clear that gas and coal were by far the two primary energy sources in France over the period shown. In addition, the proportion of energy generated by all types of energy rose, while that by petro declined.

In the year 1995, coal was the main energy source of electricity production in France, making up around 30% of the total amount of energy. Likewise, gas stations ranked second and consisted of 29.63%. In the following 10 years, although only saw small rises of around 1%, gas and coal remained the most important sources consumed by France to produce energy.

With regard to the remaining types of energy sources, more than 29% of the total amount of energy was produced using petro in 1995. However, in 2005, petro stations only contributed just under 20%. In contrast, there was a growth of around 5% in the energy produced by nuclear and other sources, and they made up around 10.11% and 9.10% respectively in the final year.



Is there any synonym for energy "sources", I find myself repeating that word a lot! Thanks for reading my writing. I really appreciate it!

  

Top answer

If you give information in the first paragraph, like France, do not keep repeating it in the body paragraphs. The reader knows what country you are writing about. Also, if you want a high score in Task 1, you must learn how to combine categories and make comparisons.

  • If you give information in the first paragraph, like France, do not keep repeating it in the body paragraphs.
  • The reader knows what country you are writing about.
  • Also, if you want a high score in Task 1, you must learn how to combine categories and make comparisons.
  • You need to learn to use pronouns to avoid repetition.
  • If you would like a sample essay for this task, you can ask.
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1 Answers
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If you give information in the first paragraph, like France, do not keep repeating it in the body paragraphs. The reader knows what country you are writing about.

Also, if you want a high score in Task 1, you must learn how to combine categories and make comparisons. You need to learn to use pronouns to avoid repetition.

If you would like a sample essay for this task, you can ask.

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