Can you grade and fix errors in my essay ( I fixed the same mistake that I made in my last essay) )

Task 2
Children find it is difficult to concentrate on or pay attention to their study in school. Why? How can we solve this problem?

In recent years, the problems associated with the study of children have been receiving extra attention from the public, especially the parents. Many students are struggling to focus on their study. In this essay, I will discuss this view and some steps to tackle this problem.
Obviously, the issue why some pupils find it is not straightforward to concentrate on their study is explained by two reasons. Firstly, social media and smartphones are influencing the process and study result of a large number of children. It is clear that they devote their time to instant messages, surf the webpages and they neglect the deadlines at study. Moreover, these top-notch technologies are liable to cause sleep deprivation that leads to problem concentrating. Secondly, some students claim that an unpleasant subject, such as history, geography, is the most thing making them confuse. the student would be stressful and lose their motivation as they are forced to learn such lessons.
However, there are practical and manageable steps that help children to be more concentrative in their study. To begin with schools, these academic institutions should be sophisticated advised to the parents on how to manage the child`s use of social media and what the pitfalls are. In addition, parents should pay extra attention to how their children study and spend their time. At last, the lessons should be improved to attract pupils and it is necessary for the teacher to check their student`s exercises regularly in the class.
In conclusion, paying attention to study at an early age is a basis for how successful children are in future study and career. Hence, teachers, schools and parents should put more sources into this issue.