Can you give some advice and band score for my essay

EX: Explain some of the ways in which humans are damaging the environment. What can gorverments do to address these problems? What can individual people do?

Nowadays, our environment is becoming more and more polluted due to people’s activities. Although there will undoubtedly be some adverse consequences of this trend, some methods can be implemented to tackle these potential problems by both goverments and each individual.

As far as I’m concerned, with the development of science and technology, which leads to the emergence of a growing number of vehicles, modern machines,…, a large amount of CO2 emission is released into the air. This causes air pollution and green house effect, resulting in the global warming, which makes the climate severely change and become complicated. Moreover, many factories also take responsibility because of their sewage being discharged directly into the lakes, rivers,.. without adequate pre-treatment. As a result, the water is badly contaminated and induces many negative effects. There will be shortage of clean water and people will have to suffer from various dangerous diseases.

Besides, there are some solutions that could be taken to reduce the ever-increasing environmental pollution. Firstly, goverments had better introduce laws to prevent natural destruction. For example, people who throw rubbish into the street, cut down tree illegally or these factories which don’t follow steps to treat sewage, should be fined according to the severity of their actions. Secondly, in terms of individual people, they should raise awareness and educated about the importance of the environment and what life will be if the nature is seriously damaged. They should also learn to reuse and recycle, use less packing, plastic bags,… which are difficult to decompose.

All in all, a variety of measures can be taken to mitigate the issues that are certain to arise as the environment is destroyed by human.