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Anonymous Posted 17 years ago
Grammar

Can someone revise my essay?

The younger generation of people go through all sorts of changes from the beginning of puberty to the arrival of adulthood. This period is for the most part accompanied with worriment as they attempt to fit themselves into society. While this time in a person\'s life can be characterized by good health and prominent attainments, it also puts them into difficult decisions that they might not have any control over, so they end up having to make choices that have different consequences. The complications that will occur during their lives will affect them in serious ways and, based on their decisions, will have a monumental impact on their paths to the future. Making the wrong decisions will result in devastating problems as they head into adulthood. From their schoolwork to how they are cared for, the youth may have to look forward to several notable issues that come along their way.

Young people will encounter issues regarding education. Children who deal with mental disabilities are already at an uphill climb to reach their educational goals. They do not possess the fundamentals to compete at their average level of education and get held back because of their handicaps. However, even those who do not have these issues still have difficulties with education, most notably if they attend a high school in an urban area. High schools in the major cities have higher drop out rates. The schools are also sticken in poverty and cannot afford the best faculty or supplies that will help their pupils achieve in the field of education. Another main issue affecting children and their academics involves teachers and whether or not they will stay on the job and commit to their occupation. Recently, a fair share of teachers have been retiring from their positions while others decide to take up something else in regards of employment. It is crucial for teachers to stay commited in their jobs to help the development of students in their efforts of improving their education. Parents also need to be involved in their childrens lives to help their educational level. It is unfortunate, but many parents today fail in their responsibilities and end up underestimating the importance of school. Failure of their involvement often leads to behavioral issues with the child.

As well-documented, the younger generation may be at odds in regards to their schoolwork. If that was not enough, social issues and situations often bring consequences to the youth. Children who are homeless find themselves with huge disadvantages in life. Homeless children do not have any shelter and often feel left out in a community. Lack of a shelter makes them more prone to being victims of crime. It also equals to higher stress levels for the child. Children who are homosexauls end up having to deal with ridicule from their peers, as social institutions influence a high rate of homosexual youth suicide. When they have serious issues with stress, children begin using alcohol and drugs. Causes of this include pressure from friends and family or if someone is giving them a hard time and they want to get away from it. Alcohol and drugs could make a person feel decent for a brief time but when the high wears off, the person feels awful, depressed and not like themselves very much. Once a person is addicted, they begin to only focus on getting high. Female teenagers who get pregant often get into issues in terms of society and finances. They usually cannot afford basic needs for the child and end up having complications with childbirth. Premature labor and low birth weight of their babies are causes of teenage pregnancies.

The youth also deal with a number of conflicts regarding child care. Because the child\'s experiences and relationships that occur early in life have a major influence on their future development, the quality of their care is an important concern for everyone involved. Children need a stable and frequent relationship with a care giver who will be delicate and acknowledging so they can develop a young person with a stable emtional state. Poor care of children often lead to child abuse and neglect. A lack of care could also result in deficiencies regarding social situations. When they become independent, the child would have not developed the skills to adapt to everyday society. It also could cause them to suffer when it comes to brain development, beacuse poor care will negatively effect how they learn and read and write. They can become more self-confident in themselves with the proper child care.

There are a countless number of problems that confront the youth today. A great deed for parents and teachers to do is to put their minds on the problems of young people and face reality, to take on accountabilities and give their affectionate help in every way that they can. It is inexcusable to pass over the fact that the world can be difficult and that others have not really given their problems as much attention as should be warranted. While it might be easy to present knowledge, the same cannot be said about building up a bound between younger and older people which is key to the process of fixing their problems, difficulties on which young people need wise leadership and compassion. The younger years can be a complicated and complex experience, yet with the guidance of trusthworthy adults, they should not feel afraid or embarrassed to discuss these issues.
  

Top answer

Hi, Here are a few overall comments. We can't assess the effectiveness of this unless you tell us the essay topic or title. You have written this as one huge paragraph.

  • Hi, Here are a few overall comments.
  • We can't assess the effectiveness of this unless you tell us the essay topic or title.
  • You have written this as one huge paragraph.
  • To be frank, many people will just refuse to read such a thing.
  • An essay needs to be organized into several paragraphs, as follows.
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1 Answers
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Hi,

Here are a few overall comments.

We can't assess the effectiveness of this unless you tell us the essay topic or title.

You have written this as one huge paragraph. To be frank, many people will just refuse to read such a thing.

An essay needs to be organized into several paragraphs, as follows.

A one-paragraph introduction.

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