Can Someone Please Review This? :)

Does anyone mind reviewing my essay for the scholarship committee?
We were asked to write an essay explaining what we have accomplished with our leadership skills
and how it benefited our classmates. Any input is appreciated. Please let me know what you think!

Throughout my life, I have had the opportunity to make accomplishments as a leader. Some of these accomplishments include leading my high school basketball team to the district finals, directing my classmates to perform well on group presentation, and successfully performing my duties as department coordinator at my church on Sundays. I have gained important qualities through these experiences. Some of the valuable leadership traits that I’ve obtained and strengthened are: setting the correct example, being a motivator, and being considerate about my subordinate’s abilities.

One of my most significant leadership accomplishments was being selected as captain of my high school basketball team and leading my team to the district finals. Captains of sports teams are often given the stereotype that they are the most athletic player on the team, score the most points, or handle the ball the best. In truth, captains have a lot of work that doesn't even involve playing the sport. Captains are the most looked at player of the game; other players, younger kids, and coaches look to them to set examples. As captain of the basketball team, I had to set examples in every aspect of the game; It was not limited to just my athletic performance. I had to set the leadership standard for commitment, confidence, intelligence, and attitude while on the court. It’s essential for every team to have a leader that sets these examples if they wish to see success.

Whenever I am required to work in groups I take the initiative to motivate people to speak up, give ideas, and brainstorm about ways that can help the group to achieve our goals. It’s important to effectively communicate the shared goal and help each member understand the important role they play in reaching that goal. It’s also important to devise a plan for completing the project on time. Having a plan of completion laid out helps to stimulate the groups thinking and interaction because we are all following the same road map. In turn, this boosts the group’s morale and performance.

As department coordinator at my church, one of my initiatives was to allow volunteers to perform tasks with which they felt most comfortable. I would speak with each volunteer, so I could receive insight into their talents and preferences. For example, one volunteer told me that he was naturally a great organizer and enjoyed tasks such as arranging shelves in a neat and visually appealing manner. I learned that he worked for UPS and had experience with loading delicate material onto the truck. After learning this, I knew he would make a perfect fit in the church’s Setup Department. This department would best compliment his natural talent. He appreciated that I had taken the time to learn more about him, and he enjoyed the work I delegated. Getting to know the volunteers had tangible results in volunteers' job satisfaction and overall performance.

I’ve learned through these accomplishments that leadership is not only about the person leading. It only works when there are several executing and distributing the good choices throughout people. Leadership isn’t about dictatorship or control, it is about setting high standards for performance and values, validating efforts and contributions, and ensuring cooperative interaction and performance in a trusting, respectful work environment.