Can someone help me revise my essay?

Question

i came from the philippines its my 2nd year here in america.i never speak english back there. after 2 years of speaking english i can say it fluently now. but im not a good writer. i have a project due this monday. My teacher told me to redo my essay. i have no idea whats wrong with my essay. all the past teachers i have gives me A`s and B`s on my essay. He told me that your past teacher is not helping you to be a good writer they give you A`s and B`s because you do the project. Please help me thanks.

ArchieWW · Accepted Answer

I will try to help.  How long is your essay? - can it be posted on here or is it too long?

Tulagga · Answer

Based on the odyssey, the life back then compared to the life now it’s not much of a difference. The only things change is the technologies and the way of life we have. Greeks praise their Gods like it’s a must. And for the people who believe that there`s a ***/s does the same thing. Because for us the Gods are there to guide us in our life and gives us blessings. Homer describes the relationship between the gods is like a father and son relationship. Gods do care about their men and knows what the best is for them but sometimes some of the Greeks think that they’re not blessed enough because bad thinks are happening to them but the real reason is the gods are helping to many people for them to guide everyone at the same time. Without the Gods in our minds and spirit it’s like solving pre calculus without taking algebra, Life will be hard to solve. One of the examples about the relationship between the gods and the Greeks is the connection between Athena and Telemachus. While Telemachus is busy planning to look for his father, Athena`s concern about Telemachus is like a mothers love. She never lacks of care, she`s always there to guide Telemachus and she treat Telemachus like her own son. When Telemachus needed some men, Athena disguised and recruited people to join Telemachus`s voyage. Also Inside the palace, Again Athena disguised to trick all the suitors. Who is telemachus in Athena`s life? Telemachus is only a human while Athena is the Goddess of Beauty. Do the Gods really help the people who have faith in them? But Athena is not the only one who`s helping humans individually even the highest *** “Zeus” do care about the people who has strong faith in him. During the journey to troy Achilles and his men offer something for the Gods to keep them safe. But Odysseus really takes his offering seriously. Taking the best part of the lamb and offer it to the Gods. In return when Odysseus got trapped in the island of calypso Zeus helped Odysseus to escape. Calypso`s affection to Odysseus is out of reach but she`s forced to let go of Odysseus because she`s afraid of Zeus wrath. Calypso ask Zeus why is that the male gods fell in love and make love with the humans. But when the female gods fell in love it ends up with frustration. Calypso is a goddess so it means that Gods have weaknesses. They feel the same way as humans when they fall in love, they get happy and getting their heart broken. The Gods knows what your destiny is and they can create your destiny and knowing what are you ending up to. But sometimes Gods can be playful too they can make your path easier or harder. Greeks always pray or sacrifice for the Gods especially when something wrong is happening. Odysseus ship wrecked while he was on the water he prayed if someone can help him. Ino came and feel bad for this poor guy but in the end she gave Odysseus the scarf of immortality. Odysseus keeps fighting on the water battling Poseidon’s rage. But once again Athena is there to help Odysseus she countered the wind by saying they need to be quiet and she calmed the sea down and helped Odysseus to reach the Phaeacian. Zeus knows that in the 20th day Odysseus will make it home as long as he keep doing what he`s doing and stay kind and faithful to the Gods. The Greek Gods act like humans, they get mad like humans, they care like humans and they fall in love like humans. The only difference is that they are in another level and they make the script of how our life`s going to be. Males is weak against women even the Gods who got powers have weaknesses. Some Greeks don’t appreciate what the gods gave us because we want more or we don’t see it because it’s probably a sign. But one thing is sure, The Gods would never let their people be in harm as long as everyone stays faithful and believe in them.

Tulagga · Answer

he always tell me to proof reading i tried to proof read its just i dont know what to change.

ArchieWW · Answer

It was hard work going through that, but here is your essay with the errors corrected:
Based on the odyssey, there is not much difference between life and life now. The only things that have changed are technology and our way of life. Greeks feel compelled to praise their gods. And the same applies to people who believe that there is a ***. Because for us, the gods are there to guide us in our life and give us blessings. Homer describes the relationship between the gods as being like a father and son relationship. Gods do care about their men and women and know what is best for them, but sometimes some of the Greeks think that they are not blessed enough because bad things are happening to them. However, the real reason is that the gods are helping too many people for them to be able to guide all of them at the same time. Without the gods in our minds and spirit, it is like solving pre calculus without taking algebra - life will be hard to understand. One of the examples about the relationship between the gods and the Greeks is the connection between Athena and Telemachus. While Telemachus is busy planning to look after his father, Athena`s concern for Telemachus is like a mother’s love. She is always caring, she is always there to guide Telemachus and she treats Telemachus like her own son. When Telemachus needed some men, Athena disguised and recruited people to join Telemachus`s voyage. Also inside the palace, again Athena disguised herself to trick all her suitors. What part does Telemachus play in Athena`s life? Telemachus is only a human while Athena is the Goddess of Beauty. Do the gods really help the people who have faith in them? But Athena is not the only one who is helping humans individually. Even the highest *** “Zeus” does care about the people who have strong faith in him. During the journey to Troy, Achilles and his men offer something to the gods to keep them safe. But Odysseus really takes his offering seriously, taking the best part of the lamb and offering it to the gods. In return, when Odysseus got trapped in Calypso’s island, Zeus helped Odysseus to escape. Calypso`s affection for Odysseus is out of reach, but she is forced to let go of Odysseus because she is afraid of Zeus’s wrath. Calypso asks Zeus why it is that male gods fall in love and make love to humans. But when female gods fall in love, it ends up with frustration. Calypso is a goddess, so it means that gods have weaknesses. They feel the same way as humans do when they fall in love; they become happy and their hearts are broken. The gods know what your destiny is; they can create your destiny and know how you will end up. But sometimes gods can be playful too; they can make your path easier or harder. Greeks always pray or sacrifice for the gods, especially when something wrong is happening. Odysseus’s ship was wrecked and while he was in the water, he prayed for someone to help him. Ino came and felt bad for this poor fellow, but in the end, she gave Odysseus the scarf of immortality. Odysseus keeps fighting in the water, battling Poseidon’s rage. But once again, Athena is there to help Odysseus. She counters the wind by saying they need to be quiet and she calms the sea down and helps Odysseus to reach the Phaeacian. Zeus knows that on the 20th day, Odysseus will make it home as long as he keeps doing what he is doing and stays kind and faithful to the gods. The Greek gods act like humans, they get mad like humans, they care like humans and they fall in love like humans. The only difference is that they are on another level and they make the script of how our life is going to be. Males are weak when dealing with women - even the gods who have powers have weaknesses. Some Greeks do not appreciate what the gods have given us because they want more things in life. [or we do not see it because it is probably a sign – DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS BIT]. But one thing is sure, The gods would never let their people come to harm as long as everyone stays faithful and believes in them.

Tulagga · Answer

Oh wow thank you sir! I really appreciate it. This is gonna be my guideline for my next essays. i am not only going to copy and paste this but im going to compare my essay to this and see the difference so i could learn from it. once again thank you sir and *** bless.

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