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Anonymous Posted 15 years ago
Grammar

Can I rewrite this sentence like this?

An American major was killed and three American officers were wounded in a complex, calculated assault by a nominal ally. (Orginal sentence)


An American major was killed and three American officers were wounded in what was a complex, calculated assault by a nominal ally. (Rewrite)


An American major was killed and three American officers were wounded in what fresh accounts reveal was a complex, calculated assault by a nominal ally. (Rewrite)

  

Top answer

The second sentence is still grammatical but not an improvement. The third adds new information that is simply not present in the first. If you know it to be true, then you can re-write it that way.

  • The second sentence is still grammatical but not an improvement.
  • The third adds new information that is simply not present in the first.
  • If you know it to be true, then you can re-write it that way.
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1 Answers
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The second sentence is still grammatical but not an improvement.

The third adds new information that is simply not present in the first. If you know it to be true, then you can re-write it that way.

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