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Effio Dinh Posted 6 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Can anyone help me evaluating this?

The chart below shows the percentage of household in owned and rented accommodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The given illustration represents the number of rented and owned accommodation over a period of nearly a century from 1918 in two states of the UK - England and Wales

From a general perspective, the number of people owning houses was obviously seen experiencing an upward trend over the mentioned years while the proportion of tenants underwent the opposite.

Starting from 1918, the figure of household owner (about 76%) was approximately thrice as much as that of the rented ones (about 24%). However, the number of people buying houses from then on, continually rose and the proportion eventually peaked at nearly 70% in 2001 before experiencing a slight fall of about 5% in the next 10 years. The percentage of tenants in England and Wales, ironically, fell non-stop from more than 78% in 1918 and eventually bottomed at about a third of the total household in 2001. It subsequently recovered to slightly more than 35% 10 years later. Surprisingly, there was a perfectly equal percentage of 50% for both of the household owners and tenants in 1971.

  

Top answer

Here are my suggestions: The given illustration represents the percentages of households living in number of rented and owned accommodation s over a period of nearly a century , from 1918 to 2011, in two states of the UK - England and Wales . ] From a general perspective, the percentage of households number of people owning houses was obviously seen experiencing an upward trend over the mentioned years while the proportion of tenants underwent went in the opposite direction . Starting from 1918, the figure of for household owner s (about 76%) was approximately thrice as much as that of the renters rented one s (about 24%).

— Doctor D

  • Here are my suggestions: The given illustration represents the percentages of households living in number of rented and owned accommodation s over a period of nearly a century , from 1918 to 2011, in two states of the UK - England and Wales .
  • ] From a general perspective, the percentage of households number of people owning houses was obviously seen experiencing an upward trend over the mentioned years while the proportion of tenants underwent went in the opposite direction .
  • Starting from 1918, the figure of for household owner s (about 76%) was approximately thrice as much as that of the renters rented one s (about 24%).
  • However, the number of people buying houses from then on, continually rose , and the proportion eventually peaked at nearly 70% in 2001 before experiencing a slight fall of about 5% in the next 10 years.
  • [New subject, new paragraph ] The percentage of tenants in England and Wales, ironically, fell non-stop from more than 78% in 1918 and eventually bottomed at about a third of the total household s in 2001.
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2 Answers
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Here are my suggestions:

The given illustration represents the percentages of households living in number of rented and owned accommodations over a period of nearly a century, from 1918 to 2011, in two states of the UK - England and Wales. [You need to correct this statement because we are not dealing with numbers, we are dealing wi

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You can read my example essay for this topic as it was submitted by another student.


https://www.englishforums.com/English/IeltsWritingTaskCheck/bxxrjp/post.htm


You have used these words and phrases incorrectly:

given illustration

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