Are these two sentences properly worded?

When Sara Dunstan, a woman who had been exiled from the evil knighthood prior to the Chaos War, arrived in Neraka in 385 AC disguised as a Dark Knight, Targonne quickly became very impressed with the elder warrior. Soon thereafter, when Sara was thrown into a crater within the ruins of the Temple of Darkness and attacked by a group of vicious insect-like creatures called horaxes, Targonne ventured down on a rope to pull her to safety