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Anonymous Posted 12 years ago
Grammar
Are there any corrections to be made here?
A part of my story. Can it be written more coherently?
Stealia demands to see her daughter, and at which point, Emma aspirates the baby’s sex as a male, and Stealia composes herself, stands up and looks at the boy with unparalleled hatred, then turns and scowls at Cromis. She names him as a liar and has her guards take him to the dungeons on account of treason. Sven is stupefied at the situation and attempts to calm Stealia down only to evoke her ferocity by which she takes his head in her hands and thrusts her reptilianesque tongue down his throat. She whispers in his ear that she is going to kill his son and will kill him too should he speak of this event to anyone else. He begins choking on her tongue and at which point she releases him, leaving him to fall to the ground in exhaustion, while she walks past Emma, who is protecting the baby in her arms, appearing unscathed, and exudes a tremendous sense of direction and purpose. Malvious, her consort, follows Stealia's shadow; though not before affirming her words by looking at Sven in an undermining way; as if he will exploit her rage for his benefit and further encroach on their relationship.
Stealia demands to see her daughter, and at which point, Emma aspirates the baby’s sex as a male, and Stealia composes herself, stands up and looks at the boy with unparalleled hatred, then turns and scowls at Cromis. She names him as a liar and has her guards take him to the dungeons on account of treason. Sven is stupefied at the situation and attempts to calm Stealia down only to evoke her ferocity by which she takes his head in her hands and thrusts her reptilianesque tongue down his throat. She whispers in his ear that she is going to kill his son and will kill him too should he speak of this event to anyone else. He begins choking on her tongue and at which point she releases him, leaving him to fall to the ground in exhaustion, while she walks past Emma, who is protecting the baby in her arms, appearing unscathed, and exudes a tremendous sense of direction and purpose. Malvious, her consort, follows Stealia's shadow; though not before affirming her words by looking at Sven in an undermining way; as if he will exploit her rage for his benefit and further encroach on their relationship.
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