Anyone can help me with this essay

Many students like to get involved in extra-curricular activities at university such as social clubs or sports. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

This is my essay

A huge number of undergraduates realizes the importance of soft skills, so they tend to take part in extra-classroom activities at university. People argue that this brings benefits to them, but others think there are drawbacks to students.

A main advantage of joining in social clubs is the fact that it helps them to boost the ability of using the soft skill flexibly in the real life. Annually students participate in voluntary activities such as Green Summer Volunteer Campaign or Spring Volunteer Campaign. Undergoing these campaigns helps them improve their teamwork or communication skills because they have to cooperate with others to accomplish their missions. Besides that, students who are keen on playing sports in their leisure realize that this brings benefits to them because this is a way to enjoy themselves after intense lessons.

In contrast, one problem of being very fond of extra-curricular activities is time-consuming. The dense schedule within a short time of volunteer campaign makes them vulnerable to exhaustion. They also cannot concentrate on their major study because extra-curricular activities always come into their mind. Another problem is that they can be involved in an accident when playing sports. Actually, there are some cases that students getting injured have to stop their study temporarily to go to a hospital for a medical treatment.

In conclusion, I think it is a good idea to participate in extra-classroom activities because of many benefits bring to students. However, they should be aware of their study to graduate from university.