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Mashmellow Posted 19 years ago
Grammar

any grammatical mistake? please help!

0 my friend is opening a massage centre. the name is "icy ocean massage centre" and the advertisement lines he is about to use is " sooth the pain like a piece of ice , relieve the mind like a breeze of the ocean" " a chance for the body and mind to reflex, refresh, and revive". can anyone help to correct any grammatical mistake here and moderate it to a more english way?thank you very much! 0-
  

Top answer

0 01blockquote 01cite 10Mashmellow12cite 11font 10M12font 10y friend is opening a massage centre. 11font 10T12font 10he name is "11font 10I12font 10cy 11font 10O12font 10cean 11font 10M12font 10assage 11font 10C12font 10entre" and the advertisement lines he is about to use is " 11font 10S12font 10ooth the pain like a piece of ice , relieve the mind like a breeze of the ocean" " 11font 10A12font 10 chance for the body and mind to reflex, refresh, and revive". thank you very much!

— Feebs11

  • 0 01blockquote 01cite 10Mashmellow12cite 11font 10M12font 10y friend is opening a massage centre.
  • 11font 10T12font 10he name is "11font 10I12font 10cy 11font 10O12font 10cean 11font 10M12font 10assage 11font 10C12font 10entre" and the advertisement lines he is about to use is " 11font 10S12font 10ooth the pain like a piece of ice , relieve the mind like a breeze of the ocean" " 11font 10A12font 10 chance for the body and mind to reflex, refresh, and revive".
  • thank you very much!
  • 12blockquote 10" sooth the pain like a piece of ice , relieve the mind like a breeze of the ocean" This is pretty meaningless, even by advertising standards.
  • Ice numbs, rather than sooths.
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13 Answers
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0 01blockquote
01cite10Mashmellow12cite11font10M12font10y friend is opening a massage centre. 11font10T12font10he name is "11font10I12font10cy 11font10O12font10cean 11font
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0He may want to rethink the name. As much as I love the ocean, the thought of an 01i00icy02i00 ocean is extremely unappealing.0-
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0 01blockquote
01cite10Feebs1112cite11blockquote
11cite20Mashmellow22cite21font20M22font20y friend is opening a massage centre. 21font20T22font20he name is "21font20I22font20cy 21f
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0 thank you all! any more opinions? 0-
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0 about the name, he listed four: ocean breeze( not approved by the registration office), icy ocean, star river, eastern sunrise, can you help to pick one? 0-
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0Star river is meaningless to me. 02br
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00Icy ocean is unappealing.02br
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00Eastern sunrise would be my preference. You'll feel renewed, like a new day starting with the sunrise (in the east), I guess.0-
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0 Icy ocean is very unattractive. It makes me think as though I am going to be plunged into icy cold water at some point. 0-
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0 what if you are living in a very hot place? you are always hot and sweaty? does that make the name sound better? 0-
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0I really can't say. I on the coast of the northern Atlantic. Every year, at least a few people died from hypothermia after they ended up in the water. Perhaps people who do live in a steamy climate, who have never seen the ocean all grey with chunks of ice in it, would think of it as appealing. 02br
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00I am not the person you friend is marketing to, so perhaps my opinion
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