Advantages and disadvantages of study abroad

Question

In recent year, many forms of education have gradually become popular, one of which is studying abroad. People said that studying abroad will have great benefits for the development of your country. However, there are also opinions that studying abroad has many risks.

Studying abroad has today become the new normal, people wishes to move to other countries because of a lot of benefits. The greatest advantage of studying abroad is that it helps you to improve your language skills. You get to learn new words everyday and also can talk to your friends and people in daily basis in same language which you were not able to achieve before. Another benefit that you get to enjoy after studying abroad is that it really helps to expand their network for some great job opportunities in the future. For example, based on the statistics of employers, most of the successful candidates have good foreign language skills or they have studied abroad. Then, studying abroad boosts your confidence. When you come to other countries to study, you have to exposed to new language, new culture and new people, it may be difficult for you to adapt at first, but once you settle in, you will realize that your confidence has improved.

Everything that has some advantages come with some disadvantages too. While there are many advantages of studying abroad, there are many disadvantages of the same too. First of all, studying abroad might look fascinating to you but it is extremely expensive. The more advanced the country, the higher the expenses. One of the biggest problems that many students have to face is the language that they are not fluent in. For example, students have a lot of difficulty in speaking the native language or even understanding it. Sometimes, teachers prefer to teach the lessons in the local language of the city. Last but not least, if you choose studying abroad, you have to do almost all of everything by yourself. There are many students who have never lived out of their home before. Many times it has been noticed that students who live alone tend to suffer from loneliness or in some cases, even depression.

In conclusion, studying abroad is a good option and worth a try. However, you should consider it because of the difficulties you may face while studying in another country.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

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Subject: Please review my IELTS essay

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Topic: Copy the essay instructions accurately here. You did not post the complete instructions, so put them in a reply or comment.

My essay:

(Your text here...)
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AlpheccaStars · Answer

1. The most obvious problem in your writing is the many mistakes with word forms. For example, the wrong verb form or a singular instead of plural noun.

2. The next serious problem is the word count.

You wrote almost 400 words. The minimum is 250. You will not lose points for writing more; however, longer essays generally do not get high band scores.

And there are many reasons for this.

First, the longer the essay, the more chances you have to make errors, and you will lose points for each of those errors.

Second, your writing may be repetitious and wordy. This will cost you points in task response or coherence and cohesion.

Third, you will likely stray off-topic, and examiners will deduct points if you are not focused on the topic. Do not write about things that are not specifically given in the task. You will also be tempted to use weak or unsound arguments or even lose your direction and contradict yourself. Develop just two or three argument points with examples and personal experiences. It is much better to have two well-developed and fleshed-out argument points than to have four which are just individual separate statements.

Fourth, you will spend a lot of time writing, and not have sufficient time left over to proofread your essay. You will miss the silly mistakes, which everyone makes, and that lowers your score.

Fifth, pity the examiners who have to read all the IELTS essays individually. There are hundreds of them. If they read your long essay when they are tired at the end of the day, they will score extra hard and not be very generous when scoring.

Sixth, you will not have enough time for Task 1, and get a lower score there. You should allow 40 minutes for task and 20 minutes for Task 1. The word counts are designed so that you have ample time for brainstorming and then writing the two parts.

Aim to write 270-290 words for Task 2. Practice writing a lot of essays so you get a feeling for the length.
You can use this word counter: https://www.ieltsscore.com/word-counter/

AlpheccaStars · Answer

In recent year, many forms of education have gradually become popular, one of which is studying abroad. People said (wrong form) that studying abroad will have great benefits for the development of your (?? the examiner's ) country. However, ~~there are also opinions that~~ studying abroad has many risks.

Your opening does not make much sense. "Form of education" is not a useful phrase in this context. The topic is not about forms of education. At 43 words, it is extremely wordy. Cut out the unnecessary text and streamline your writing. You repeat the phrase "studying abroad" three times. Repetition will lower your score a lot.

Here is a paragraph of 33 words that opens this subject much more clearly and directly.

It also resolves the issues with your paragraph.

The benefits are for the student, not "the development of the examiner's country." In your body paragraph, you do not mention this at all.

The country is not subjected to any risks, the student is.

Studying abroad is very popular. People say that it brings great benefits, not only to the student but also their homeland. However, there are many risks for those who elect to do this.

Studying abroad has today become the new normal, (Normal is what everyone does. I do not think that is your meaning.) people wishes (wrong form) to move to other countries because of a lot of benefits. The greatest advantage of studying abroad is that it helps you to improve your language skills. You get to learn new words everyday (wrong form - everyday is an adjective.) and also can talk to your friends and people in (wrong word) on a daily basis in same language which you were not able to achieve (wrong word) before. Another benefit that you get to enjoy after studying abroad is that it really helps to expand their (wrong pronoun) network for some great job opportunities in the future. For example, based on the statistics of employers, (not a good phrase) most of the successful candidates have good foreign language skills or they have studied abroad. Then, studying abroad boosts your confidence. When you come to other countries to study, you have to exposed to (wrong expression) new language, new culture and new people, (comma splice error) it may be difficult for you to adapt at first, but once you settle in, you will realize that your confidence has improved. (So what are the benefits for the country? All the ones you have described are personal.)

~~Everything that has some advantages come with some disadvantages too.~~ (unnecessary) While there are many advantages of studying abroad, there are many disadvantages ~~of the same~~ too. First of all, studying abroad ~~might look fascinating to you but it~~ is extremely expensive. The more advanced the country, the higher the expenses.(You need to add a transition phrase. Cohesion and coherence is poor.) One of the biggest problems that many students have to face is the language that they are not fluent in. (You just wrote that the new language is a benefit. That is contradictory.). For example, students have a lot of difficulty in speaking the native language or even understanding it. Sometimes, teachers prefer to teach the lessons in the local language of the city. (I don't understand this point. ) Last but not least, if you choose studying abroad, you have to do almost all of everything by yourself. There are many students who have never lived out of their home before. Many times ~~it has been noticed that~~ students who live alone tend to suffer from loneliness or in some cases, even depression. (Your paragraph lacks coherence and cohesion. You do not develop your ideas very well. Also, in the first paragraph you wrote "risks" but there is no mention of any risks in the body paragraph. Another problem with coherence and cohesion.)

In conclusion, studying abroad is a good option and worth a try. However, you should consider it because of the difficulties you may face while studying in another country. (You did not post the instructions, but I will wager that they did not ask you to give a recommendation. In that case, you lose points for "task response.")

Advantages and disadvantages of study abroad

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