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Orainyday Posted 11 years ago
Vocabulary
about metaphor
Hello everybody!I am translating a novel with many metaphors,but I'm not sure whether they sound weird. Comments on any one of them are welcomed. Thanks a lot!
1.The doctor’s instructions …visualized like a relief sculpture.[or erected?]
2.The pain in his heart flowed through the gullies of his wrinkles, and ploughed out burning tears.
3. They put in words aside for her, and finally my uncle’s anger, like a to-be-on-fire blasting charge, was extinguished by them.
4.the sensitive old man felt a dark tide would destroy her beloved little daughter’s tottering house into pieces at any time.[tottering or wooden, which is better? The point is one's family is at risk.]
5. At those nights, silence was like bamboo shoots competing to sprout after rain, brimful of huge and heavy loneliness and the endurance of it.
6. Accompanying fear, a sudden change in character, sensitivity, suspiciousness, and weirdness in behavior all like sand and dust kept growing.
1.The doctor’s instructions …visualized like a relief sculpture.[or erected?]
2.The pain in his heart flowed through the gullies of his wrinkles, and ploughed out burning tears.
3. They put in words aside for her, and finally my uncle’s anger, like a to-be-on-fire blasting charge, was extinguished by them.
4.the sensitive old man felt a dark tide would destroy her beloved little daughter’s tottering house into pieces at any time.[tottering or wooden, which is better? The point is one's family is at risk.]
5. At those nights, silence was like bamboo shoots competing to sprout after rain, brimful of huge and heavy loneliness and the endurance of it.
6. Accompanying fear, a sudden change in character, sensitivity, suspiciousness, and weirdness in behavior all like sand and dust kept growing.
Top answer
Please provide the full sentence for #1. The pain in his heart flowed ploughed through the gullies of his wrinkles , and ploughed out as burning tears. Orainyday 3.
- Please provide the full sentence for #1.
- The pain in his heart flowed ploughed through the gullies of his wrinkles , and ploughed out as burning tears.
- Orainyday 3.
- They put in words aside for her, and finally my uncle’s fiery anger , like a to-be-on-fire blasting charge, was extinguished by them.
- Orainyday 4.
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8 Answers
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Please provide the full sentence for #1.
Orainyday2.The pain in his heartflowedploughed through the gullies of his wrinkles, and ploughed outas burning tears.
Orainyday3. They put in wordsasidefor her, and finally my uncle’s fiery anger, like a to-be-on-fire blasting charg
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Without further context, in the US, you might say these as the following (as I'm understanding it):
1. The doctor's instructions...cut a deep impression, like the impressions on a relief sculpture.
2. The pain in his heart flowed out in his burning tears, filling the wrinkles in his face, and etching them deeper.
3. They put in words supporting her, and finally, my un
1. The doctor's instructions...cut a deep impression, like the impressions on a relief sculpture.
2. The pain in his heart flowed out in his burning tears, filling the wrinkles in his face, and etching them deeper.
3. They put in words supporting her, and finally, my un
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Thanks for your advice!
The novel is about a village woman suffering from depression. Her husband loves her yet gets impatient when his wife behaves abnormally. One day he shouted at his wife but soon felt guilty and cried. Then he remembered what the doctor asked him to do. In this context comes the first sentence:
1.The doctor’s instructions that provide a quiet and warm environment
The novel is about a village woman suffering from depression. Her husband loves her yet gets impatient when his wife behaves abnormally. One day he shouted at his wife but soon felt guilty and cried. Then he remembered what the doctor asked him to do. In this context comes the first sentence:
1.The doctor’s instructions that provide a quiet and warm environment
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Thanks a lot!
I especially like your version of sentence 4,5 and 6. They become very clear.
I like sentence 1,too, and it makes me understand better the original Chinese sentence in the novel. Yet the context is a man recalled the doctor's instruction, while your version emphasizes the deepness of impression. How to change the sentence to express the man remembers the doctor's wo
I especially like your version of sentence 4,5 and 6. They become very clear.
I like sentence 1,too, and it makes me understand better the original Chinese sentence in the novel. Yet the context is a man recalled the doctor's instruction, while your version emphasizes the deepness of impression. How to change the sentence to express the man remembers the doctor's wo
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#1: She visualized as a relief sculpture the doctor's instructions, which provide a quiet and warm environment and guide her to recollect pleasant experiences.
#2: It's a simile. The pain in his heart = tears that ploughed through ... etc.
#3: I wouldn't use "blasting charge" in that sentence.
#5: Try the sentence suggested by Anonymous but use "On those nights."
#2: It's a simile. The pain in his heart = tears that ploughed through ... etc.
#3: I wouldn't use "blasting charge" in that sentence.
#5: Try the sentence suggested by Anonymous but use "On those nights."
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I'm a native English speaker in the US. i've tried to reword the translated sentences in accordance with US usage, in a literary context. Thus, metaphors might have to be changed to something that appeals to the emotions of American readers - this is what I tried to do. For example, the image of tears ploughing out gullies in the wrinkles of a person's face would just not register with an Ameri
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Thanks a lot! Your advice is very helpful. Maybe I'll change bamboo into mushroom.
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