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Cboutin3 Posted 13 years ago
Grammar
A few questions with the passage?
Is this the best use of words like "afterward" and "then"? And does the whole passage flow and sound good with them?
However, the group was attacked on the road by a band of strange clerics who revealed themselves to be draconians. Afterward, the companions entered Darken Wood and encountered its unicorn guardian, the Forestmaster, who sent them to Xak Tsaroth to recover the Disks of Mishakal. Raistlin and his friends successfully completed their mission in the ruined city, during which they defeated the black dragon Khisanth, and then returned to Solace, armed with the knowledge of the true gods on the Disks. Shortly after their arrival, the group was detained by dragonarmy soldiers, who had recently attacked and destroyed the town.
However, the group was attacked on the road by a band of strange clerics who revealed themselves to be draconians. Afterward, the companions entered Darken Wood and encountered its unicorn guardian, the Forestmaster, who sent them to Xak Tsaroth to recover the Disks of Mishakal. Raistlin and his friends successfully completed their mission in the ruined city, during which they defeated the black dragon Khisanth, and then returned to Solace, armed with the knowledge of the true gods on the Disks. Shortly after their arrival, the group was detained by dragonarmy soldiers, who had recently attacked and destroyed the town.
Top answer
Two too many commas: However, the group was attacked on the road by a band of strange clerics who revealed themselves to be draconians. Afterward, the companions entered Darken Wood and encountered its unicorn guardian, the Forestmaster, who sent them to Xak Tsaroth to recover the Disks of Mishakal. Raistlin and his friends successfully completed their mission in the ruined city, during which they defeated the black dragon Khi santh and then returned to Solace, armed with the knowledge of the true gods on the Disks.
- Two too many commas: However, the group was attacked on the road by a band of strange clerics who revealed themselves to be draconians.
- Afterward, the companions entered Darken Wood and encountered its unicorn guardian, the Forestmaster, who sent them to Xak Tsaroth to recover the Disks of Mishakal.
- Raistlin and his friends successfully completed their mission in the ruined city, during which they defeated the black dragon Khi santh and then returned to Solace, armed with the knowledge of the true gods on the Disks.
- Shortly after their arrival, the group was detained by dragonarmy sold iers who had recently attacked and destroyed the town.
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1 Answers
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Two too many commas:
However, the group was attacked on the road by a band of strange clerics who revealed themselves to be draconians. Afterward, the companions entered Darken Wood and encountered its unicorn guardian, the Forestmaster, who sent them to Xak Tsaroth to recover the Disks of Mishakal. Raistlin and his friends successfully completed their mission in the ruined city, durin
However, the group was attacked on the road by a band of strange clerics who revealed themselves to be draconians. Afterward, the companions entered Darken Wood and encountered its unicorn guardian, the Forestmaster, who sent them to Xak Tsaroth to recover the Disks of Mishakal. Raistlin and his friends successfully completed their mission in the ruined city, durin
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