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Anita_a Posted 20 years ago

A Bouquet of Love



The lovely red roses
or are they your blushing lips?

The blue tulips
or are they your fun filled eyes?

The fragrant white jasmines
or is it the essence of your body?

The violet carnations
or is it the passion of desires?

Each flower in the bouquet
that you are holding
has my heart in it.
  

Top answer

Hi Anita, Perhaps if you make the poem a little more understated and rhyme the first four stanzas, the title, which is self-explanatory, will leave a stronger impression on the readers. As it is, the title repeats what the poem is stating. g.

— Julielai

  • Hi Anita, Perhaps if you make the poem a little more understated and rhyme the first four stanzas, the title, which is self-explanatory, will leave a stronger impression on the readers.
  • As it is, the title repeats what the poem is stating.
  • g.
  • The red tulips or your blushing lips?
  • ) Unlike the two gurus here, I don't know anything about poetry.
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1 Answers
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Hi Anita,

Perhaps if you make the poem a little more understated and rhyme the first four stanzas, the title, which is self-explanatory, will leave a stronger impression on the readers. As it is, the title repeats what the poem is stating.

e.g. The red tulips
or your blushing lips?

(I'd also have the eyes go first, as the lips remind me of kisses, which are more "p
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