#2 Could I ask for validation of my composition?

Question

In advance, thank you for your advice, Mr.grammarfreak.

I have slightly modified the older version of this letter but I am not yet certain that the sentences is correct and logical.
The phrases in bold are a causal clause; please validate my composition, especially the phrases in bold.

I was very glad to have received your email that I had not anticipated because you are easygoing person.
It's true that I was very happy when I heard from you.
As we had a few hot day here in Korea this summer and even though rainy season is between mid-Jun and lat July, we had a little rain this summer, I had more comfortable summer days than any other year.
I didn't travel this summer for some reason.
It is unlikely that I will travel for a while.
I will fully take a trip to Canada some day, but I don't know when yet.
I am looking forward to seeing you sometime in the future,
I'm looking forward to taking coffee with you, chatting over a nice meal and watching your home with a wide and gorgeous garden.

p.s. If I will be there, could you show me your beautiful house?

Clive · Accepted Answer

Here's a brief, general comment while you are waiting for Grammarfreak to respond

Your letter looks very unnatural to me because you have not written in paragraphs. Have you studied how to use paragraphs yet? Perhaps they are not used in Korean texts?

Clive

Park sang joon · Answer

Thank you Clive for your advice.
I have written this letter, but the source is not mine; I have just translated Korean into English, Korean is quite different sentence structures from English, and I couldn't change the content arbitrarily.
How about the grammar?

Park sang joon · Answer

I will rewrite this letter and want to close or delete this thread.

Grammarfreak · Answer

Park,
I see where your problem is. This is very typical of people who swear by the dictionary. If you rely on the Korean- English dictionary to translate the meaning of a phrase or a word, the meanings don't always match what you want to say, as demonstrated in your letter. Your wording is very stiff and unnatural, even incoherent at some spots.
I [am] very glad to have received your email. I did not expect it. ~~that I had not anticipated~~ because you are easygoing person.
Why - because you are easy going and that's why you didn't expect it!

It's true that I was very happy when I heard from you. - you are repeating your feeling expressed in the first line. Why did you say " it is true..". It is not necessary.

The rest of your letter had been previously revised in my last post with comments. We don't need to say "as we has a few days....". This is not semantically well connected with the preceding sentence. I had more comfortable summer days than any other year. If I have to guess, you are saying ' I had better summers before', is that correct?

It is unlikely that I will travel for a while. The underlined is a wrong phrase for the context. You can say: I probably won't travel for a while. This usage is fine. For your sentence, I'd rephrased it to ' any time soon', meaning , not in the nearest future. So all in all, I can't validate your letter as it has many issues, and some of them are syntax and construction in nature.

Park sang joon · Answer

Thank you for your sincere advice.
I have just posted the third version but after I have heard you, I feels that I repeated the same mistakes.
I will post the forth version soon.

p.s. I'd like to know why the sentence "It is unlikely that I will travel for a while" is not correct.

#2 Could I ask for validation of my composition?

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